Husbands, Step up to the Plate

 September 3, 2024

Tuesday

There was a time when Dad was the law of the land. Today, he is no longer in the land of the law.

(Legalism is keeping the law to attain righteousness. We can never do that. We can however be obedient to the Scriptures and walk with the Lord is a close relationship. Keeping the Word of God is only legalism when it is used to establish our own righteousness. It will neither save us or give us a close relationship with God by itself.)

The Scripture points out that the husband is to be the spiritual leader in the home. No matter how egalitarian I can be about allowing women to preach, I cannot get around this clear teaching from Scripture.

Ephesians 5:22–24 (NASB 2020)²² Wives, subject yourselves to your own husbands, as to the Lord. ²³ For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. ²⁴ But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.

Many Christian men seem to sitting in the backseat letting their wives drive the spiritual car. They do not take the lead in teaching nor in deciding what other spiritual instruction should come beyond the home. The wives are often telling their husbands where to go to church. The husbands use whatever excuse they can muster to get out of going each week. The result is a family who learns that spiritual leadership comes from mom. The daughters are taught by example that they should lead their incompetent husbands. The sons learn that they are to submit to everything their wives say. They, too, try to get out of going to church.

Of course, this doesn't end here. There are some families who are allowing their perceived needs of their children to lead. They will take their children out of church to attend sporting events. Dads, again aren't taking spiritual leadership. They are teaching that God will always wait if we don't want to meet with Him. Here, the children learn they can find a new excuse for avoiding church. Here, they might even convince their parents that they don't want to go to church unless they are the center of attention or with the most elite kids. They will decide not only when the parents go to church but which church they will go to. That is not spiritual leadership coming from the dad.

Ephesians 6:4 (NASB 2020) ⁴ Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Surely, a father can so rule over his children that he angers them. Fathers instead are to raise their children in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. It means more than how much the father knows. It is how the father acts toward his children. It is how he teaches them by example It is how he leads them rather than follows them.

In many homes, mom decides where children go to church. She responds to the perceived attractiveness of the church she chooses. Often, whether the church has a safe preschool, an engaging children's ministry and an exciting youth program becomes the center of her attention. She does this for her children. It would be somewhat odd if she didn't. On the other hand, she may ignore the preaching of God's word, excusing herself with the idea that this happens at all churches. This is where fathers must use spiritual discernment. It may be that they church they attend will have all these things that their children want and preach the Word of God faithfully. The problem is that this isn't how it was chosen. God's Word was not the focus.

So, Dads, step up to the plate. Take your place as the spiritual leader of your family. Use discernment, show extreme love and lead your families to spiritual maturity. It is your responsibility and privilege.