No one owes you love. Not even your parents.
You can't make somone love you. It doesn't matter what you have seen in the movies. You can keep some people from loving you but you can't make anyone love you.
Love is a gift. It is the decision of another person to love you. That person may not know where this love comes from. They can make themselves not love you. They can decide to love you.
It is not love when the feeling comes only because of what has been received. For example, the feelings another person gets because he or she has received a gift is not love. It may be gratitude but it isn't love. Love is a gift which is given without expecting something in return.
Love is not always a feeling. True love is always attached to a commitment. That is why the commitment is so necessary. That is why some people don't know whether or not they are in love. It is easy to discern. Are you truly committed ot the person you say you love? If so, you are in love.
The absence of commitment is a sign of limited love. People can still love without an absolute commitment but their love will always be limited. This type of love is fickle. It can come and go. It is hard to call it true love.
There are different kinds of love. There is a love you have while dating which will not measure up to the love you have after thirty-five years of marriage. The commitment makes the difference.
Some people complain that their spouses are not giving them what they want. They want to withdraw their love because of this. They don't have much to withdraw. They are talking about investments rather than love. You sell your investments when they no longer perform. They want to get rid of their spouses when they no longer perform. I can't see the difference.
I think a lot of people think God owes us something. That is why they complain when they don't get what they want. He owes us nothing. We have nothing to complain about.
God's love is simply a gift. It is just like any other love. It comes with the deepest of commitments.
John 3:16
For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only son, that whosoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.
1 comment:
Indeed love is a gift; if it is forced by another or circumstance, it is no longer love, for what is coerced is not true love.
That it is a gift, the receiver is not supposed to have merited or worked for it, we have to understand that as a giver, we give true love, not he or she has merited or worked for it. Yet, if we still love, it is a choice; and it is a commitment, for in the first place, there was no part from the one you decided to love, and none to be expected thereafter.
For the receiver, because it is a gift which you merited not, you cannot coerce true love, if you have to work for it, what you receive is NOT true love; if you subsequently have to work, that true love has stopped, the giver isn't giving out true love anymore.
True love is difficult to find and give, but there are true love in our midst. For example, uncorrupted parental love for his or her child is one. I believe it is meant by God to portray His love from His (decision of) creation of Man, it is the unconditional love or Agape love of God.
The love between spouses in a marriage is supposed to be another, but it is sad, that too many do not choose to view it that way.
While true love is a gift, we can choose, and we should choose to reciprocate love with love. And so, we are to love God, for He first loved us. Children are to love their parents, and spouses are to love one another, and men are to love one another.
In a way, love is like salvation, we do not merit or work for our entry into salvation, yet when we have been loved and being loved, we ought to love, just as in salvation, we ought to bear fruits and do good works. Good works ought to come from being saved, and acts of love, from being loved. Love begets love, even as love is not to be worked for.
Anthony Chia, high.expressions
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